ROYAL NAVAL OMSK

Current mood: UP THE EMPIRE!!!
Category: UP THE EMPIRE!!! Art and Photography

So...


Yesterday, I went to see art and as is so often the case, I left the show thinking...

Jesus Christ haven't these people got anything better to do???

Perhaps that's a little harsh. I didn't mind the video of the guys setting up, playing a brief note and then putting away their electronic instruments - that made me laugh...

But the seagull noises being piped out of speakers a stones throw from the Thames is hardly genius is it??? I mean save yourself the friggin speakers and invite folk to bring along their old bread crusts and you'll have a screaming flock of hungry seagulls flapping about before you can say "WHICH WAY TO THE RUBBISH DUMP!" Furthermore, do it that way and everyone might laugh, smile and enjoy a bit of nature rather than stroke their beard and think about how intelligent they are to consider such a juxtaposition...

As for the room set up as if it was a 'Writers Study' - Maybe it's the kind of thing that'll excite the Care Assistants of this world, but if I want to see that kind of thing, I can just get up and walk 5 fucking yards - and trust me, that kind of a site isn't in the least bit visually impressive....


I guess the problem I have with art shows is that they always remind me a little too much of being at art school - and art schools these days are worse than a waste of space...

Yes boss, I spent 3 years in such a place and I found the whole experience so contrived and ridiculous I mostly stayed at home, got stonned and did my own work...

Uhuhhhh, so ridiculous have these places become that they no longer bother to teach you how to draw?!?

The theory is the world has moved on and now anything short of farting in synch to the opening and closing of a door just won't cut it...

Painting?!? FUCK THAT!!!!
Drawing?!? OH DON'T BE SO 1950'S DARLING!!!
Sculpture??? MAYBE - BUT ONLY IF IT LOOKS FUCKING UGLY!!!!

etc


However, as underwhelmed as I was with the art, you'll be please to know I didn't leave Greenwich dissapointed...

No boss, the setting for this exhibition was the truly epic Old Royal Naval College and the small green speck on the hill inbetween the two foreground buildings in this first photo is the home of Greenwich Mean Time..

Now, I'm most likely going to offend the lefty right on politically correct folk with this viewpoint, but give me this kind of built spectacular majesty over sixth from art school fluff any day of the fucking week...

Yes boss, I know these buildings and the setting are all about might and military strength. Built by grandiose architect Sir Christopher (Lovely Hair!!!) Wren, this college was all about Britain stomping it's merry way around the world subjugating natives, stealing markets, imposing the rule of law and securing tea....

But for my money, art is supposed to be about visual and brazen magnificence and has nothing whatsoever to do with morals...

Yes boss, art's about incredible strength and moving power. It's supposed to be epic and FUCKING HUGE!!!!!!!! It's supposed to make you sit up and go FUCKING WOW!!!!

And if I'm being completely honest, this setting - these nasty capitalist empiric buildings did that for me and for my sins, I willingly wandered off into it all, feeling like I'd learnt and experienced something....

Currently listening : Sketch Proposals By Ensemble Release date: By 16 May, 2000

18:43 - 15 Comments - 6 Kudos - Add Comment - Edit - Remove

	The Cupid Kinkyboots Fan Club	Different time, different era, those buildings captured the magnificence of the British Empire in it's heyday. That architecture is supposed to stir you with nationalistic fervor, patriotism, and pride. I don't know what the other stuff you described was supposed to do, maybe inspire ridicule. I think that these modern day artists who have imagined what comprises "art" nowadays aren't pushing boundaries. They've just run out of ideas. They don't have the imagination to create something inspiring, so in their quest for "originality" they end up making something that turns out to be stupid. Posted by The Cupid Kinkyboots Fan Club on Saturday, January 26, 2008 at 01:55 [Remove] [Reply to this]

	: THE FUTUREPROOF MUSIC BLOG BY PIOUS GIOVANNI :	You've nailed it... I find art and artists to be incredibly lazy these days. You can say what you like about these buildings and what they mean, but they sure as shit took some serious and intense effort to make... It's a history show and parts of it are very ugly - but they set me thinking and I'll damned if any of the rest of the art in that show is going to do likewise in a few hundred years time... Posted by : THE FUTUREPROOF MUSIC BLOG BY PIOUS GIOVANNI : on Saturday, January 26, 2008 at 02:11 [Remove] [Reply to this]

	stEvil	"lefty right"??? surely not 'both' sides of the political spectrum at once??? and surely yours is a critique of the postmodern turn in art??? the left (i'm thinking strictly of adorno and horkheimer et. al. at this point) would surely be raging against the 'art' that you have described... i like big old buildings, too. Posted by stEvil on Saturday, January 26, 2008 at 02:19 [Remove] [Reply to this]

	: THE FUTUREPROOF MUSIC BLOG BY PIOUS GIOVANNI :	I found that Rome blew my head off... The buildings are just fucking incredible on the eye - this rather fascist monument in particular... Then there's the Colleseum, Circus Maximus etc As for The Pantheon?? Completely fucking breathtaking and then again when you realise just how old it is... Posted by : THE FUTUREPROOF MUSIC BLOG BY PIOUS GIOVANNI : on Saturday, January 26, 2008 at 02:36 [Remove] [Reply to this]

	stEvil	big is beautiful Posted by stEvil on Saturday, January 26, 2008 at 11:14 [Remove] [Reply to this]

	: THE FUTUREPROOF MUSIC BLOG BY PIOUS GIOVANNI :	Often beautiful but always impressive...! Posted by : THE FUTUREPROOF MUSIC BLOG BY PIOUS GIOVANNI : on Saturday, January 26, 2008 at 11:42 [Remove] [Reply to this]

	La Paloma, the Queen of Infinity	Two Kudos for Cupid. Right on. the closest thing we have to anything of such grandeur here in north america is Las Vegas... Posted by La Paloma, the Queen of Infinity on Saturday, January 26, 2008 at 03:24 [Remove] [Reply to this]

	: THE FUTUREPROOF MUSIC BLOG BY PIOUS GIOVANNI :	What about the White House?? Posted by : THE FUTUREPROOF MUSIC BLOG BY PIOUS GIOVANNI : on Saturday, January 26, 2008 at 03:27 [Remove] [Reply to this]

	La Paloma, the Queen of Infinity	i've never seen it in person. though, i am told it is smaller than one might expect. i am told there are some pretty impressive structures in Washington DC, but I've never been. And everything in the US is still so new (comparatively) that it does not have the aura and ghosts that make old buildings magnificent. Posted by La Paloma, the Queen of Infinity on Saturday, January 26, 2008 at 03:30 [Remove] [Reply to this]

	: THE FUTUREPROOF MUSIC BLOG BY PIOUS GIOVANNI :	And what about New York City??? Shit, when I make it there, I reckon I'm gonna be wandering around with my jaw well and truly dropped... Posted by : THE FUTUREPROOF MUSIC BLOG BY PIOUS GIOVANNI : on Saturday, January 26, 2008 at 03:35 [Remove] [Reply to this]

	: THE FUTUREPROOF MUSIC BLOG BY PIOUS GIOVANNI :	This said, I take your point about time.. It was the mist and dark of the night that made the atmosphere - had it have been 300 years ago and full of sailors I might well have seen the whole setup differently... Posted by : THE FUTUREPROOF MUSIC BLOG BY PIOUS GIOVANNI : on Saturday, January 26, 2008 at 03:38 [Remove] [Reply to this]

	they came from the stars, i saw them	i love big brilliant buildings, though i'm not so sure that those ones are all that interesting or majestic. it's hardly the sagrada familia is it? as for the art - through no fault of your own i feel you have entirely missed the point, mister. OMSK has been running for 12 or 13 years and their whole thing is more or less about chaos. sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't - "nothing goes to plan and everyone has a good time". This one was another oddity in a canon of oddities as it was very installation based - Sometimes you get food fights, with the ring leader burning art books and serving them up in a stir fry, a room entirely full of cardboard boxes that people had to fight their way into to watch films, people laying on the floor doing very nearly nothing, mental people chainsawing themselves out of wooden boxes in the middle of a packed dancefloor, films that alternately bore everyone to bits then make them howl with laughter, and bands (really really brilliant bands) that come on and play a 15 minute prog/techno version of 'Land Of Hope And Glory' as a massive custard pie fight ensues (much to the chagrin of the owners of the theatre - shaving foam is as difficult to get out of red velvet). At one OMSk i was forcably held down by two very angry looking men who then proceeded to pour brandy into my mouth. OMSK fucking rocks. come again - i can't say you won't be disappointed, as there's always that risk, but i'm glad that there's always that risk. Posted by they came from the stars, i saw them on Sunday, January 27, 2008 at 12:54 [Remove] [Reply to this]

	: THE FUTUREPROOF MUSIC BLOG BY PIOUS GIOVANNI :	I've seen these buildings a good few times before, and they've never struck me as hard as they did that night. I think it was the dark. Sure, they're not The Pantheon, but I do find them to be striking - especially when you look up in the gap, and you see the green lit observatory sitting there on the hill like a fucking landing craft - shit there's even a lazer beam coming off of it... As for the show - it's true I don't know much about Omsk... But then neither does most of the population - So is Omsk just a cliche for informed and clever people??? As far as I'm concerned art has to be self evident and self explanatory. You have to be able to get it from what you see infront of you without being told - you have to feel there's something new and exciting even if you can't put you finger on exactly what it is.. What I saw at the Omsk show was exactly what I expect to see in an art show in 2007 - a bunch of clever arty people being clever and arty (all of the time convincing themselves they're anything other than the cliche of the modern artist...) It's boring... I sincerely believe that art needs to move on and away from Marcel Duchamp and his fucking conceptual urinal. That was a good joke and since then there have been other good art jokes and I'm sure there will be more - but this endless repeating of the same ideas done slightly differently bores me very quickly.. I spent 3 years at art school watching people do this kind of thing time and time and time again - shit I've even done it myself on occasion... The problem is that it no longer burns my boat... Posted by : THE FUTUREPROOF MUSIC BLOG BY PIOUS GIOVANNI : on Sunday, January 27, 2008 at 13:48 [Remove] [Reply to this]

	they came from the stars, i saw them	Trust me a little, doc. These people are punk as Fuck and will experiment with anything they care to without giving one about the response they get, good or bad, all they want to do is experiment. If you don't believe me, try thinking of the most stupid idea you can and approach them with a view to doing it... Posted by they came from the stars, i saw them on Sunday, January 27, 2008 at 15:02 [Remove] [Reply to this]

: THE FUTUREPROOF MUSIC BLOG BY PIOUS GIOVANNI :

I'm thinking about it.... Posted by : THE FUTUREPROOF MUSIC BLOG BY PIOUS GIOVANNI : on Sunday, January 27, 2008 at 16:03 [Remove] [Reply to this]