KIDS OF SIR PAUL...PT1
Current mood: DEAD MAN ON THE BUS
Category: DEAD MAN ON THE BUS Music
On September 12th 2005 Mrs Giovanni and myself were in Brighton...
It was Mrs G's 29th birthday and we'd gone down to Hove to watch Sussex play Kent at cricket...
The game was unremarkable. Mushtaq Ahmed was causing chaos by way of a nicely groomed patch of rough - but other than that, it was a relatively peaceful days play enjoyed under a lovely low autumn sun...
So, game over for the day, we walked along the promenade into Brighton to find dinner.
We were almost in the town when Mrs G tugged my sleeve.
"I know this guy. He used to be my boyfriend..." she said as if it were news that might be exciting..
I took a good look at the disgrace of a figure walking straight towards us. He was a lank long blondey gingerhead and he looked out of it...
"It's him, I'm sure it's him!!" Mrs G insisted
"How wonderful!" I replied, rather more keen of food than one of those stupid 'Oh nice to see you...!!...Oh, well take care...!!))' conversations that should never start...
Mrs G wasn't however of the same opinion, and as we walked past him she tried catching his eye, and when he looked back vacantly (VERY FUCKING VACANTLY!!), she got in his face and said..
"John??"
The harridan looked truly spooked by that. He thought for a second then replied..
"James?!"
His eyes rolled - he didn't look sure..
Well christ, I thought if you can't even do the name it's no wonder Mrs G moved on to greener pastures..
But no, unless the bumberclut had forgotten his name, it became clear it wasn't this ex-boyfriend called John, and after a few seconds of everyone looking slightly asconce at one another, wierd smiles were exchanged and we all walked on our separate ways..
On the surface an unremarkable story - so unremarkable that from about 5 minutes after the incident until yesterday I'd completely forgotten about the whole thing..
So what changed..?
Well, in her job working for one of the greatest asses of all time, Mrs G spends her days starring at pictures of celebrities, touching up their virtual tits and removing pixel cellulite at celebrity picture agency Big Pictures...
Yes, Mrs G works for the devil and yesterday, she was correcting a set of pictures of Paul McCartneys son James, and as she sharpened the colours and trimmed the edges, she recognised the face...
"I'm sure it's him...!!"
Yes boss, Mrs G is sure that the bloke who claimed to be called James who Mrs G thought was her ex-boyfriend John on Brighton promenade in 2005, was in fact James McCartney - reclusive son of Sir Paul...
So, what are the chances of this James we bumped into being McCartneys son?
Well, I would say pretty good. McCartney has a home in Brighton, Mrs G swears on the face and it's her job to recognise faces, he was called James, and most of all, he looked dead freaked out when Mrs G called him John!!
 | Currently listening :
Discography: The Complete Singles Collection
By Pet Shop Boys
Release date: By 05 November, 1991 |
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