Current mood: SMASH YOUR HEAD IN!!!
Category: SMASH YOUR HEAD IN!!! Music
About 6 years ago I went to see Iggy Pop at Brixton Academy...
Myself and Birthday Boy Tommy Nadir are a third off the front as support act Ptichshifter perform...
Pitchshifter are alright, but they are not mind blowing.
I get the impression this is the story of their career. Several times they've seemed to be right on the edge of big commercial and critical success - but it's never quite come off for them...
Anyway, Pitchshifter finish and I'm beginning to work out my strategy for getting to the front for Iggy.
Yes boss, Iggy is of course the type of performer for whom you need to be up close - and this is set to be the first time I've seen him do his thing, so it's vital...
So, as I'm downing my pints in readyment, this girl comes over and starts talking to me...
WHAT?!?!
I'm flatterred. I'M SINGLE!!!! I'M HAVEN'T HAD SEX FOR SOME MONTHS!!!! SHE'S PRETTY!!! THIS IS GONNA BE GREAT!!!!!!
BUT WAIT!!!
IGGY POP IS ON IN LESS THAN HALF AN HOUR!!!
And the last thing I need is to be doing is swaying gently at the back smooth talking or snogging...HELL NO, I NEED TO BE UP THE FRONT GETTING ELBOWED IN THE FACE BY A COMPLETE STRANGER!!!!!
The girl asks me what I do
'WHATEVER I LIKE' I YELL!!!
The girl doesn't look impressed with this answer, whereas I believe I am a genius for saying something so Iggy just as he's about to take the stage...
Well, time passes, my beers are almost done, this girl is still talking, Nadir is looking abandonned, Iggy is imminent and I am still a third way down the crowd..
It's time to get moving!!
I finish the beers, drop the glasses, try and kiss the girl, she pulls back, then walks away...
You can't win them all....
IGGY!!!!!!!
(PS)
I have since discovered that saying 'Whatever I Want!!!' isn't what many girls want to hear...
No boss, you're far better off saying 'Whatever You Want Dear!!!!'
Seriously...
I saw this item on the news a few years back about this 90 somethng year old couple who'd been married for 75 years and they still looked happy...
'What's the secret of such a long marriage?' The reporter asked
'Say 'Yes dear!' alot...' the man said smiling....
 | Currently listening : The Idiot By Iggy Pop Release date: 1992-06-29 |
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