CROCODILE SHOES??

Current mood: CURIOUS Category: CURIOUS Fashion, Style, Shopping ?? OK... Regular readers will know I sometimes deviate off the point of music and the arts and saunter into stranger and less sensible territory in the search for truth and answers... And right now, I'm now going to do just that... You see, one undervalued and important part of my job as Paul Giovanni 3rd AKA Futureproof Pious, is to better understand women, so as to increase domestic bliss, help world peace, to further the chances of good records being made, save the children etc etc. To be honest it's been a long and winding road, but one by one I feel sure I've worked out all female idiosyncracies except a small number that still perplex me... With specific regards to dress, I almost have the full set, but despite my best efforts, there's one particular aspect of female couture I don't understand at all... This is: Exactly what constitutes a pair of 'Fuck Me Shoes' ??? Now, I reckon I could recognise a 'Fuck Me' top or a 'Fuck Me' dress, and even a pair of 'Fuck Me' trousers, but I've no idea what constitutes a pair of Fuck Me shoes??? So if any of my female or for that matter male readers could provide some tips on how to spot these (diagrams and/or photos appreciated) I'd be very grateful indeed... Thanks in advance... pg) ?? Currently listening : The Red Shoes By Kate Bush Release date: By 02 November, 1993 9:07 PM - 73 Comments - 16 Kudos - Add Comment - Edit - Remove

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	Renate Müller II	Well that glittery shit's all wrong for a start off. Posted by Renate Müller II on August 15, 2007 - Wednesday at 9:59 PM [Remove] [Reply to this]

	: THE FUTUREPROOF MUSIC BLOG BY PIOUS GIOVANNI :	So neither of these pairs are??? I was figuring they were.... Posted by : THE FUTUREPROOF MUSIC BLOG BY PIOUS GIOVANNI : on August 15, 2007 - Wednesday at 10:01 PM [Remove] [Reply to this]

	Renate Müller II	Not in my opinion, no - depends very much on the personality of the woman. One woman's fuck-me shoe is another woman's Japanese-tourist comfy pump. Posted by Renate Müller II on August 15, 2007 - Wednesday at 10:08 PM [Remove] [Reply to this]

	: THE FUTUREPROOF MUSIC BLOG BY PIOUS GIOVANNI :	So it completely depends on the personality of the woman and there's no set standard?? Posted by : THE FUTUREPROOF MUSIC BLOG BY PIOUS GIOVANNI : on August 15, 2007 - Wednesday at 10:09 PM [Remove] [Reply to this]

	Renate Müller II	Rule 1: There is NO set standard when it comes to shoes. I am intrigued now...is Mrs G's birthday coming up?? Best stick to vouchers! Posted by Renate Müller II on August 15, 2007 - Wednesday at 10:11 PM [Remove] [Reply to this]

	Renate Müller II	http://www.schuhstore.co.uk:80/more_images.asp?i_code=1106667020&name=MISS%20SIXTY%20PETRA%20CHAIN%20COURT Possibly?? Posted by Renate Müller II on August 15, 2007 - Wednesday at 10:35 PM [Remove] [Reply to this]

	: THE FUTUREPROOF MUSIC BLOG BY PIOUS GIOVANNI :	THESE??? Posted by : THE FUTUREPROOF MUSIC BLOG BY PIOUS GIOVANNI : on August 15, 2007 - Wednesday at 10:41 PM [Remove] [Reply to this]

	Renate Müller II	Yeah...I quite like them. You haven't posted the most flattering pic though! Did you look at the other views?? Posted by Renate Müller II on August 15, 2007 - Wednesday at 10:45 PM [Remove] [Reply to this]

	: THE FUTUREPROOF MUSIC BLOG BY PIOUS GIOVANNI :	From a distance.. Posted by : THE FUTUREPROOF MUSIC BLOG BY PIOUS GIOVANNI : on August 15, 2007 - Wednesday at 11:40 PM [Remove] [Reply to this]

	Renate Müller II	You know NOTHING, Posted by Renate Müller II on August 15, 2007 - Wednesday at 11:57 PM [Remove]

	: THE FUTUREPROOF MUSIC BLOG BY PIOUS GIOVANNI :	I reckon this lack of set standards is the cause of a lot of problems between me and women. Men love statistics and strict standards and women don't really believe in them in the same way... Frankly I think it's something you ladies should work on taking an interest in. I recommend something like following a football team as being the perfect introduction to the importance of statistics.. Oh, and no, I'm not thinking of buying a pair for Mrs G, I was watching Pretty Woman last night (for the first time) and the question leapt into my head... Posted by : THE FUTUREPROOF MUSIC BLOG BY PIOUS GIOVANNI : on August 15, 2007 - Wednesday at 10:34 PM [Remove] [Reply to this]

	Renate Müller II	Hooker shoes????? Well that's a whole different thing. I've put a link above. Posted by Renate Müller II on August 15, 2007 - Wednesday at 10:36 PM [Remove] [Reply to this]

	: THE FUTUREPROOF MUSIC BLOG BY PIOUS GIOVANNI :	What about these??? Posted by : THE FUTUREPROOF MUSIC BLOG BY PIOUS GIOVANNI : on August 15, 2007 - Wednesday at 10:44 PM [Remove] [Reply to this]

	Paloma, First Lady of Infinity	I have red shoes like this (my favorite red shoes). davey has asked me specifically to puncture his thigh with them. this is my vote. Here they are: for some reason I have a picture of maryJane's legs in these shoes: Posted by Paloma, First Lady of Infinity on August 15, 2007 - Wednesday at 11:06 PM [Remove] [Reply to this]

	maryJane	well. honestly, i just wanted to make it around the block without eating sidewalk ;) Posted by maryJane on August 16, 2007 - Thursday at 12:26 AM [Remove]

	: THE FUTUREPROOF MUSIC BLOG BY PIOUS GIOVANNI :	So: Mary Jane, what were your intentions the night you wore these shoes??? Puncture his thigh??? You Americans... Posted by : THE FUTUREPROOF MUSIC BLOG BY PIOUS GIOVANNI : on August 15, 2007 - Wednesday at 11:18 PM [Remove]

	Renate Müller II	Nice colour! A bit plain though...what about some straps, buckles, bits you can play with?? Posted by Renate Müller II on August 15, 2007 - Wednesday at 10:47 PM [Remove] [Reply to this]

	: THE FUTUREPROOF MUSIC BLOG BY PIOUS GIOVANNI :	Straps? Buckles?? We're talking about rough and racey intercourse here not amateur tailoring.... Posted by : THE FUTUREPROOF MUSIC BLOG BY PIOUS GIOVANNI : on August 15, 2007 - Wednesday at 11:26 PM [Remove]

	maryJane	right. definitely no glitteroid shoes. the closest ive got are "comefuckme" boots...which are knee-high, tight, black leather boots with an outrageous heel. Posted by maryJane on August 15, 2007 - Wednesday at 10:15 PM [Remove] [Reply to this]

	: THE FUTUREPROOF MUSIC BLOG BY PIOUS GIOVANNI :	OK. So maybe this is why Pretty Woman sparked the question in my head. Roberts goes for just those sort of shoes in order to facilitate her original line of work... Posted by : THE FUTUREPROOF MUSIC BLOG BY PIOUS GIOVANNI : on August 15, 2007 - Wednesday at 10:35 PM [Remove] [Reply to this]

	maryJane	maybe stripper pumps...need 4in heel, at least. i feel like you used false advertising to get me to read this one...i saw "crocodile shoes" and was all excited to see the fall line for jimmy choo or something ;) Posted by maryJane on August 15, 2007 - Wednesday at 10:17 PM [Remove] [Reply to this]

	: THE FUTUREPROOF MUSIC BLOG BY PIOUS GIOVANNI :	I was hoping I wouldn't get any complaints from people who were hoping to see a feature on the UK pop icon Jimmy Nail... Posted by : THE FUTUREPROOF MUSIC BLOG BY PIOUS GIOVANNI : on August 15, 2007 - Wednesday at 10:39 PM [Remove] [Reply to this]

	Zoom Visuals TM	Well if these are so called "fuck me" shoes then how the fuck do I get fucked when all I wear are doc martens, crocs & skate trainers?? hahaha - I must be a genius!! Posted by Zoom Visuals TM on August 15, 2007 - Wednesday at 10:30 PM [Remove] [Reply to this]

	: THE FUTUREPROOF MUSIC BLOG BY PIOUS GIOVANNI :	Well if it's an individual thing without a set standard, a particularly racy pair of your skate pumps might do the job...? Posted by : THE FUTUREPROOF MUSIC BLOG BY PIOUS GIOVANNI : on August 15, 2007 - Wednesday at 10:40 PM [Remove] [Reply to this]

	cjface	Posted by cjface on August 15, 2007 - Wednesday at 11:12 PM [Remove] [Reply to this]

	: THE FUTUREPROOF MUSIC BLOG BY PIOUS GIOVANNI :	OK... Well this is a different angle altogether Posted by : THE FUTUREPROOF MUSIC BLOG BY PIOUS GIOVANNI : on August 15, 2007 - Wednesday at 11:38 PM [Remove] [Reply to this]

	Paloma, First Lady of Infinity	wow and you just mention shoes and you get all us girls in on the conversation. clever. i'm embarrassed to admit how much i love shoes. but not those bedazzled blue things up there. classic stilettos without too much going on...they make me feel sexy. Posted by Paloma, First Lady of Infinity on August 15, 2007 - Wednesday at 11:37 PM [Remove] [Reply to this]

	: THE FUTUREPROOF MUSIC BLOG BY PIOUS GIOVANNI :	Tomorrow I'm gonna make up some theory about handbags... Posted by : THE FUTUREPROOF MUSIC BLOG BY PIOUS GIOVANNI : on August 15, 2007 - Wednesday at 11:39 PM [Remove] [Reply to this]

	Paloma, First Lady of Infinity	dont get me started on handbags... Posted by Paloma, First Lady of Infinity on August 15, 2007 - Wednesday at 11:40 PM [Remove] [Reply to this]

	maryJane	oh snap. handbags are my second love. im fully prepared to take out a ridiculous loan, usually reserved to buy cars and the like, so i can buy myself an hermes kelly bag, cherry-red croc skin.... materialistic love. Posted by maryJane on August 16, 2007 - Thursday at 12:24 AM [Remove] [Reply to this]

	: THE FUTUREPROOF MUSIC BLOG BY PIOUS GIOVANNI :	You're both fucking wierdos.... Posted by : THE FUTUREPROOF MUSIC BLOG BY PIOUS GIOVANNI : on August 16, 2007 - Thursday at 12:32 AM [Remove] [Reply to this]

	: THE FUTUREPROOF MUSIC BLOG BY PIOUS GIOVANNI :	I reckon I'll find a music video with a handbag in and then ask everyone to discuss the importance of accesorising in music videos.. Posted by : THE FUTUREPROOF MUSIC BLOG BY PIOUS GIOVANNI : on August 15, 2007 - Wednesday at 11:45 PM [Remove] [Reply to this]

	DANX GROD!	How about these... (but don't forget that a lot of times, it has to do with the rest of the outfit too, not just the shoes). Posted by DANX GROD! on August 16, 2007 - Thursday at 12:12 AM [Remove] [Reply to this]

	: THE FUTUREPROOF MUSIC BLOG BY PIOUS GIOVANNI :	Oh jesus, I was just thinking that all the men had suddenly gone very quiet and now this... 3 full annotated options....WOW! Posted by : THE FUTUREPROOF MUSIC BLOG BY PIOUS GIOVANNI : on August 16, 2007 - Thursday at 12:20 AM [Remove] [Reply to this]

	Renate Müller II	Those pink ones are very nice...although I would never wear them - not outdoors anyway. Posted by Renate Müller II on August 16, 2007 - Thursday at 12:20 AM [Remove] [Reply to this]

	: THE FUTUREPROOF MUSIC BLOG BY PIOUS GIOVANNI :	I've concluded that we're mostly talking about stilettos, but what about those flat pink ones of a few posts back?? Posted by : THE FUTUREPROOF MUSIC BLOG BY PIOUS GIOVANNI : on August 16, 2007 - Thursday at 12:22 AM [Remove] [Reply to this]

	Renate Müller II	Those plastic 'Croc' shoes?? They're okay - but they're not fuck-me shoes. They are 'lets-go-for-a-walk-on-a-pebble-beach-and-collect-driftwood' shoes. An attractive alternative to fucking in my opinion. Posted by Renate Müller II on August 16, 2007 - Thursday at 12:27 AM [Remove] [Reply to this]

	: THE FUTUREPROOF MUSIC BLOG BY PIOUS GIOVANNI :	But I reckon you could go have a walk on a pebble beach and then have a rampant fuck in the surf without even worrying about what was going on with the shoes!!! Posted by : THE FUTUREPROOF MUSIC BLOG BY PIOUS GIOVANNI : on August 16, 2007 - Thursday at 12:34 AM [Remove] [Reply to this]

	DANX GROD!	Sure, any shoe will do for fucking. The point here is which shoe invokes the thought of sex. What makes it a "fuck-me" shoe. Most times it seems that the "fuck me shoes" will lift up the female ass, so that the visual of the uplifted ass brings on thoughts of sex. Think about it. If you are standing and doing a girl from behind, she will lift her heels and go on tip toes. As though she was wearing high heels. That's the way I see it anyway... Cheers! Posted by DANX GROD! on August 16, 2007 - Thursday at 12:59 AM [Remove] [Reply to this]

	Paloma, First Lady of Infinity	i was kind of thinking this, but it just seemed like a "guy" and unladylike thing to say... Posted by Paloma, First Lady of Infinity on August 16, 2007 - Thursday at 1:44 AM [Remove] [Reply to this]

	: THE FUTUREPROOF MUSIC BLOG BY PIOUS GIOVANNI :	OK I'm getting this now. Is it odd it's taken a man to make the explanation clear?? Posted by : THE FUTUREPROOF MUSIC BLOG BY PIOUS GIOVANNI : on August 16, 2007 - Thursday at 1:03 AM [Remove] [Reply to this]

	DANX GROD!	The reason a man explained it is (I think) because fuck-me shoes are designed to attract men (generally speaking). And I am not a foot fetishist. In fact, I am with you regarding this topic. I don't get it. I understand what it is, but I don't get it. Gimme a nice pair of boobs, or a curvy butt. But feet and shoes? whatever... Posted by DANX GROD! on August 17, 2007 - Friday at 12:14 AM [Remove] [Reply to this]

	Renate Müller II	You should put that line on a t shirt. For research purposes, I can reveal to you that I am currently wearing black Birkenstock sandals. Posted by Renate Müller II on August 16, 2007 - Thursday at 12:46 AM [Remove] [Reply to this]

	: THE FUTUREPROOF MUSIC BLOG BY PIOUS GIOVANNI :	Mrs G keeps trying to sneak Birkenstocks onto my feet, but I refuse them solidly. I have a cheap pair of Lidl fakes her Dad gave me, but that's as far as I'm taking that one. I'm a fan of Jesus sandals myself. I'm also in the market for a apir of yellow trainers, but I can't find the right ones... Posted by : THE FUTUREPROOF MUSIC BLOG BY PIOUS GIOVANNI : on August 16, 2007 - Thursday at 12:49 AM [Remove] [Reply to this]

	Renate Müller II	How about Converse trainers? Too girly for you?? They're always available in a whole rainbow spectrum of styles and colours, that's the thing... Posted by Renate Müller II on August 16, 2007 - Thursday at 12:52 AM [Remove] [Reply to this]

	: THE FUTUREPROOF MUSIC BLOG BY PIOUS GIOVANNI :	Too cliched for me.... I had a couple of pairs and I did love them, but I didn't know Kurt died in them then and now that I do, I wouldn't want to wear them for advertising reasons... Posted by : THE FUTUREPROOF MUSIC BLOG BY PIOUS GIOVANNI : on August 16, 2007 - Thursday at 12:55 AM [Remove] [Reply to this]

	Renate Müller II	Maybe you're a bit old for trainers anyway... Posted by Renate Müller II on August 16, 2007 - Thursday at 12:57 AM [Remove]

	maryJane	those are unsanitary and no one should wear them. ever. Posted by maryJane on August 16, 2007 - Thursday at 12:25 AM [Remove] [Reply to this]

	DANX GROD!	I was just surfing and happened to find this. I think it is a good example. Posted by DANX GROD! on August 16, 2007 - Thursday at 1:05 AM [Remove] [Reply to this]

: THE FUTUREPROOF MUSIC BLOG BY PIOUS GIOVANNI :

Yes, I think I understand the principle now. My next question is, is their a male equivalent??? Posted by : THE FUTUREPROOF MUSIC BLOG BY PIOUS GIOVANNI : on August 16, 2007 - Thursday at 1:07 AM [Remove] [Reply to this]